:: BïtS 'N' PiëCÉS ::

domenica, luglio 31, 2005

:: Wanfen's fantastic CD ::

dammit, i am in such a sentimental mood these few days... argh... why do i keep getting reminders of parts of my life in the past few years!!!

Thanks Wanfen! for the CD! oh manz, it was sooo good, it made me abandon my patho report and dance around the room... (but then there isn't a lot to make me abandon that blasted report) when Celia Cruz's 'yo viviré' came on, i startled my poor sick bro by bursting into song plus an action tt wasn't unlike communists protesting... (according to him)... it is a very liberating song anywayz...

and as i listened to the cd i was so painfully, drastically, 'bittersweetly' reminded of those 2.5 glorious years of an alternate 'spanish' universe... and i miss 'gor' so much!!! though i'm happy for his 'move up', can't help thinking, we'd still be in meeting up regularly now if not for that... he keeps zooming ard one moment in france, next moment online at 4am (ie. US...) and suddenly back in sg again?! damn, issit actually possible to feel emotional attachment to >1/2 guys at the same time? aiyo.

ok now luis miguel is on... *sob sob* his songs all so sad...

Dopey @ 12:51 PM | 0 comments

sabato, luglio 30, 2005

:: medical musical & some other stuff ::

The MM was hmmm so-so lah, i can't help comparing it to huang2cheng2 (the annual play held by HCJC) and the centennary play we had in SCGS during out final year there... i still rem crying my eyes out at that play. heh. i think. but then again, it's not fair to compare medical school with scgs wat rite? we had so much time to prepare for the centennary play then, even O levels took second place! haha... ahhhh, gone are those carefree days where there were no unfriendly competition, sneaky bitchings, talking behind others' backs, the unpleasant side of life (and its people)... SCGS was such a happy lil'bubbly place... no fears, no worries, life then was a bed of roses indeed. *sob sob* miss SC so much!

PS: SANZ, MICH, OPEN HOUSE COMING SOON! WANNA GO SEE? WE JUST PRETEND WE ARE SCOUTING FOR POTENTIAL PRI SCH FOR OUR SISTERS/COUSINS/FUTURE DAUGHTERS...

kudos to Ivan for his damn cool performance, that guy's amazing, i never knew he had such hidden talents:
- drama
- singing (one of the better singers there)
- tap-dancing
- and hair that's sooo long and silky! ah jealous!

Cheok and Lynette were awfully cute... lynette reminds me of rosario (will and grace) heh heh heh...

MM was an emotionally draining event, apart from the fact that it was so drawn out and there were too many subplots in it. the complicated love triangle was neither here nor there, it wasn't well-developed enough and it didn't have an ending (i guess they wanted it that way but...) maybe they should have scrapped it all together. the evil plans to buy over the medical school? sounded a bit too YLL to me, but unfortunately we couldn't do what they did in the play... that part where they managed to make the evil person sign the agreement was rather corny. when would this ever happen in real life???

It made me think of my first year in medical school. can't remember whether i was all out to 'save the world' but it definitely isn't what i'm doing medicine for now... hmm... 'saving the world' just seems to big and too noble. i'm content to do whatever little thing i can to help those i am able to. I'm proud to be a member of the faculty and i hope to make them proud of me as well...

(sidenote: yeah lately i've done something that i'm not particularly proud of and hmmm given a chance, i'd do it differently, i hope it won't be harped upon or too widely spoken of, or i'll probably end up blah-ing again...)

but what is true is how i've changed since then.
then, i was:
- VERY shy
- VERY uncomfortable talking to any guy
- VERY boring
- VERY studious
- VERY toot
- VERY much a mugger
- VERY um... not there in the fashion sense...

now, i am:
- getting increasingly BHB
- comfortable talking to most guys
- always falling asleep
- i would like to say i am no longer a boring person, but that's sth i leave my frds to judge
- toot or not? i hope not lah...
- not so studious, my grades are proof of my 'slackness'...
- claims to be mugger, but actually not a mugger liao. haha...
- fashion sense ah, still not quite there yet

but hmm... in the light of recent events and the growth of a little green sapling that my two friends have been watering and fertilising (with much enthusiasm, sheesh!)... and a sms just a few hours ago... i've realised that... well, i have failed to really open up to anyone. sadly... it's not you guys (you all are always very supportive and encouraging) but it's just myself. i don't find it easy to 'open up'... and most times, by the time i open up to you all, it's because i've already dealt with whatever emotional entanglement that was. i don't know how easy i am to 'read' especially regarding matters concerning interpersonal relationships, but i don't think it's that easy... afterall, i tend to always appear with either one of these three emotions on my face:
- sleepiness
- irritation
- cheerfulness
i guess when i am sad, i also look cheerful, when i'm stressed i look irritated or overly chirpy... and when i'm disappointed, i look... ... still cheerful. seems like all but one has been able to see through my fake cheerful periods: afterall, it was almost a month after nico left that people actually realised he had gone... (and it was because i opened my mouth to tell them...)

oh dear, i've gone to expect too much from friends again! i cannot expect people to be the kun1 cong2 in my stomach after all... haiz...

Dopey @ 10:17 PM | 0 comments

mercoledì, luglio 27, 2005

:: 'not so pure after all' - the cannonization ::

EW just told me that the word 'canNonization' in my last blog was wrongly spelt. it ought to be canonisation, single 'n'.

therefore a much-needed ERRATA is required ->



so sorry, and um... the money goes to me.... i won't mind the halo either. heh.

haha... don't say u didn't ask to be canNonized ah...

Dopey @ 8:40 PM | 0 comments

lunedì, luglio 25, 2005

:: "ah well. thats me. heart so pure. heh." - st. stanley ::


Our 'Holiness', Stan McFairyland, officially cannonized himself as a Saint, in the garden city of Singapore, in front of his Fujitsu notebook, on Sunday, July 24. He will be known as Saint Stanley of Hougang.

He is affectionately known as st. stanley the spendid = splendid (pukes) + spendrift...

when asked what his reaction was, (apparently this reporter had made it to heaven), he replied...

"people of all wealth...have a good heart...always...donate generously to ME haha..."
"and always be kind to animals and xcbs (xia char bor)... and ants"

"always spare a thought for others...esp the poor and the spendthrift"

Bless me, and his pink shirt...
PS: i dunno if modern 'saints' wear pants? or jeans? so i opted for a blue toga... hehheh...

(shan't suan him too much since he's advocated kindness towards xcbs ie. yesh, pls donate to me as well. thank you very much. though i'm not very keen to be placed in the same line as ants. hmph.)

Dopey @ 8:05 PM | 0 comments

domenica, luglio 24, 2005

:: together, we can BEAT crime! ::

i know i am so going to get hate mail after this blog... haha.... (sigh, prob imaginary hate mail cuz pple don't read my blog.... ahhh mich!!!! ahbish)

HMV 3rd floor she was told, and when she entered she kind of knew that he would be at THAT section, just so 'him'. anyway, ya, he looked like a banana tt day, so yellow. banana with headphones on and apparently very entranced by the 'tang quartet's latest cd. the banana urged her to try listening and ya she did while removing the cd fr the cd sleeve just out of habit...

- 'eee, so ugly!' (refers to the tang bros... r they bros or sth?) and hastily places the cd back in, 'much safer to look at their back profiles'...
- 'i'm going to get this cd when i get money' or was it 'when i get cash injection'?
- 'oh la, some songs are ok... think i prefer the tango wan'
- 'haha, it's not yr type right'

blah blah blah... and both walked out of HMV and up the escalator... half way up...

'oh SHIT'
they looked down in horror at his hand... he was clutching the CD between the green bodyshop bag and my very big artfile... you'd think it was mediated...
and the banana vehemently denies any intention of thievery...

on retrospect, it was odd... halfway while the reality of what they had done began to sink in, she was vaguely aware that the banana was still insisting it wasn't premeditated. maybe he felt like even if he 'tiao4 jing4 huang2 he2 ye3 xi3 bu4 qing1 le' lolz... he probably had more conscience than her...

anyway, eventually they decided not to return the CD because they were afraid that the gateway would beep when they headed back in and then they'd get arrested for theft even when they were really trying to be honest citizens and return the CD. um... so well, being pple with brains, they removed the stick thingy for fear that it would beep when they shopped at other shops... lolz... and decided they'd better go do some kind of charity worth 22.95...

and mich says: it's because of you people that....

heh. i feel so bad. heh.

Dopey @ 2:01 PM | 0 comments

sabato, luglio 23, 2005

:: laughing at myself ::

poking fun at others is cruel but laughing at ourselves is something quite therapeutic. take a humorous stand on life and you'll be far happier....

In primary school...
all the itsy bitsy kids running around during PE... and i was one of them... we were supposed to do place our hands on the long benches and jump fr one side of the bench to the other... i took a huge jump and... um... my shoe (looks like xinying's shoes) flew out and hit the student jumping on the other bench on the head...

remember all those crushes and puppy loves we were SUPPOSED to have? i thought there was something wrong with me cuz i DID NOT have any crush apart from being obsessed over the author of the textbooks. heh. so i tried soooo hard to have a crush cos it was fashionable u know. so there was this guy (WW) who had this scary humongous stalker-like crush on me (praise the lord we got streamed to different classes!) who kept pestering me... so i tot i should say something: 'no, i don't like you because i like XYZ'. there was a huge silence and i found XYZ standing within hearing distance! *blush* and i think XYZ got a nose bleed courtesy of WW towards end of recess that day. *double blush* and i still haven't apologised after so many years.

In secondary school:
Sec one Chinese New Year Eve, we could wear home clothes... so i was wearing this very VERY flare skirt.... and i was getting my books from the cupboards and the wind was blowing.... *marilyn monroe impersonation* (and thank goodness i was in scGIRLS'school and we barely had any male teachers. (donato ferrars doesn't count)

the wonderful split! after being super not-flexible for years, i did a marvellous split on the running track after slipping on the grass! wow! i kind of rem a few classmates gathered round, not knowing to wow at the fantastic display of agility (from a non-ballerina) or to laugh at my predicament.

the 'pig' once threw the *pause, embarrassing realisation*... baton (is tt wat u call the stick for conducting?) at me and said 'you xiao char boh' why crescendo so fast and so loudly' during band practice. i'm glad percussion was far far back in the bandroom with the result that some euphonium player got hit instead. hah! *what lousy aim*

In JC...
one other super duper embarrassing and cruel incident happened but hmm it hurt too much for me to begin to laugh at it. *sob sob*

before harmonica performance, while we were all in the dressing room, my senior ting ting suddenly said: hey... i can see yr bra design... eh you like to wear this type of bra ah? .... and went on about size and cup and god-knows-what other details that i'd rather keep private.... and worse, zhanrui was just next to us! omg!!! SOOOOO EMBARRASSING!!!! i think both of us blushed till we look like someone with hot flushes due to menopause! and ting ting would NOT get the hint to STOP her really awkward questions. faint.

In medicine...
oh over in medicine, i must have morphed into some sort of magnet for embarrassing incidents and funny happenings. just two recent ones though...

Wenky and i were walking by the short cut fr the sc canteen to the library area and laughing about something... laugh laugh laugh... and he turns around and finds me still laughing but on the ground... i had stubbed my toe and tripped over the stone steps.

in the OT, laugh laugh talk talk... he turns and finds me on the floor again... damnit why am i so shuey... he walked over the SAME patch of floor and did not slip whereas i slipped and ended up in a sitting position with knees twisted anyhows... why why whyyyyyy?!?!?! so not fair!

In the future...
more embarrassing incidents are bound to come about... but i shall just try my best to laugh my way thru... ;)

Dopey @ 8:59 PM | 1 comments

giovedì, luglio 21, 2005

ooh, what an angry previous blog. my apologies. that's the result of not having a private blog to b*tch about pple. then again, after what's happened to xx, nothing can really be kept secret once it's online rite?

*hint hint* to HS... v dangerous ya know... later one day all yr deep dark secrets will be revealed!!! tadaaaaa!!!

anyway, heh, it must be this 'anger' that qi4si3 my 'husband' aka mr jiang. lolz... trust that JSJS to call me mrs jiang. dunno wanna wack him on the head with the tuning fork (i accidentally hit my mum on her head while doing Rinné's test!) or intubate him while he's still conscious. heh.

JSJS: hey mrs jiang, (question abt ENT)?
me: (answer abt ENT)... who's mr jiang?
JSJS: he is resting in the coffin.
me: chey. may he RIP...


you just never know the amount of crap that can take place on MSN. sigh.

Dopey @ 11:23 PM | 0 comments

mercoledì, luglio 20, 2005

i am angry. with a lot of things, mainly people and their attitudes. i am getting angry with myself as well, for expecting certain things from others, especially of my friends. it brings to mind what many horoscopes say of the aquarian - they have such high expectations of themselves and their friends that they end up isolating themselves in this 'ivory tower'.

i am getting tired of putting in what i put in for friends, especially certain friends whom i see as loyal/trustworthy/admirable/honourable... and so on. it just isn't worth it. you do a little extra, yet, most of them won't do the same for you. it's a tried and tested theory. so what's wrong? is my judgment of people so bad that i've wrongly classified people who weren't as good as my better friends? or am i expecting too much of them? or should i be scolding myself for expecting others to help me because i had helped them? but isn't the axiom 'do unto others what you wish others to do unto you' what we should all live by??? is it not right for me to expect a little from the friendship? if i'm not to expect anything from the friendship? i'd be far happier helping strangers then.

think i've had quite enough. no one else to depend on but myself. i've always believed this, but never thought it was all THAT cruelly true till now. cannot expect anything of anyone. in fact, i'm not going to be all that GREAT a friend these days. too tired. it's close to the final straw (for certain people), feel free to blame me for being apathetic in the future. i simply won't do anything extra for people who don't see me as a person that mattered enough for them to do something really small for me. i'll do just enough that the r/s remains at an above-civil level... too tired and disappointed to care too much. and then, care so much and get hurt in the process? definitely not worth it.

maybe you'd think i'm selfish, talking like that. erm but haha i never said i wasn't.

Dopey @ 10:00 PM | 0 comments

lunedì, luglio 18, 2005

:: 'the tempest' ::


the signs had been there the moment he entered the room... the 'haiz's and 'hehiz', the snorts (was it a snort? nvm...) and the slight flaring of the nostrils... and of course, a face that looked like a storm was gathering... the fact that he was having a bad day was really obvious, it was like a neon signboard above his head. it spelt the beginning of an ordeal for the feather-brained assistant who was trying her best to do what only an octopus could do efficiently.

the student did her best to keep out of the way... it wasn't easy, the room was soooo tiny and there were so many waste receptacles lying around like booby traps. at one point, she almost put her foot in one of them.


however, even though he was experiencing a bad-sort of hairday, he did not, i repeat, DID NOT vent his frustration on the student. in fact, he allowed her to see thru the scopes, do some physical examinations and was rather capable of 'joking' when she asked questions. his anger was only directed towards the nitty-gritty details of clinic-work that seems to literally 'bug' each and every big guy like fleas...

his ability to control that foul temper was impressive... he looks like one with a quick and possibly foul temper which is not easy to control. this makes his attempts to subdue that fire even more worth of respect.

the student also realised that she'd experienced one of the moooooost exemplary 'breaking bad news' situation. but unfortunately, i cannot blog it out here or she would

KILL ME and send my remains to CFM in view of the upcoming patho posting

oooooooooooooooooh. such violence.

Dopey @ 8:18 PM | 0 comments

domenica, luglio 17, 2005

CDS:
Mr & Mrs Smith Soundtrack:
A rather interesting and varied collection of songs, ranging from tango to alternative... big difference right?
- Mondo Bongo: the real smooth piece playing in the background whenever the couple relives their hot and fiery honeymoon dating days
- Assassin's Tango: sexy, seductive and explosive, the dance in the hotel, the first public encounter between both when they find out each others' real identities.
- You Are My Sunshine: lolz, this was cute... the well-known oldey done in Rock.
- Tainted Love: quite a unique song

The Italian - Patrizio Buanne:
- Debut CD, in the styles of Mario Frangoulis but definitely NOT as handsome and NOT as good.
- have to give him credit for trying TOO hard
- can't express himself as well in English as in Italian...
- the Italian pieces are catchy though, and 'A Man Without Love' is probably the best song in there.
- his second CD (i think he'll probably have that) should be better!

Fly Away - Corrinne May
- Jazz vocal, local singer
- she's probably the ONLY local talent i've ever thought of supporting. (er, in this case it would mean convincing erhem to get the next album if one comes out and then borrowing from him hahaha...)
- I liked 'something about you'... but i think i like 'journey' best!!!

Safe In A Crazy World - Corrinne May
- Newly released, just this year
- more catchy tunes, faster, more upbeat
- unfortunately one song sounds like one of those national day songs... eh, i hope she doesn't have anymore of those coming up.
- 'Free' is rather interesting... especially the phrase - 'six degrees of separation' haha...
*there's something really wrong with me this two days, i keep spelling six as SEX! Urgh!
- the birthday song is quite meaningful, finally something different!
- 'if i kissed you' has a catchy rhythm but the chorus is the typical one.

******************************************************************

BOOKS:
Asking for Trouble: Tales of Saffy and Amanda - Jason Hahn
Review: it's an ultimate sinful delight! Like how chocolates are usually described! I feel sooo guilty picking up the book, knowing that it is full of crap, yet funny crap, with a silver of truth here and there. And knowing that i ought to be reading corbridge instead. It's about the lives of 2 lawyers and a HR personnel (i think all educated overseas) who are single, and live together in a condo plus a dog called Pooch. The gals rave about their dates, do all the girlish stuff while Jason, strives to understand how the female brain works. Saffy is a really open-minded, talkative, jumps-from-topic-to-unassociated-topic (reminds me of myself) gal who relishes gossip and is faced with the eternal challenge of finding a future-husband. Amanda is a harvard law school graduate, armed with a few more degrees, beautiful body and a stash of high-end stylish clothes (ME jealous...) who faces the same problem. Other characters are the typical auntie singaporean - Sharyn (nice spelling!), the gay Barney (ohhhh he's sooo cute, i'd like to have such a funny frd, any of my guy frds offering to turn gay? and a 'happily-married' Karl...

******************************************************************

FILMS:
'Fantastic 4': ok, it's the -typical- not a lot of plot, cheesy lines kind of film that has been developed from comic books. Ioan Gruffudd (Reed Richards) is rather like a mu4 tou2 ren (but then again, how many guys AREN'T?) and Jessica Alba's (Sue Storm) really didn't look good in blond and her acting was AWFUL... especially her reaction when Julian McMahon (Victor von Doom) proposed. omg... McMahon however, is deliciously evil haha as usual... why does he always get to be the bad guy? (the demon in 'charmed' and the crooked plastic surgeon in 'nip/tuck). i would say only Michael Chiklis (Ben Grimms) is realistic enough. sigh. Overall though, i would grade it about similar to 'War of the Worlds'...
Between so-so plot, so-so corny jokes coupled with a story that actually has a proper beginning and ending vs a chopped up plot, couple with lame ending but fantastic cinematography... which would you choose?

'Ms Congenialty 2 - Arms & Fabulous': it was quite the letdown really. The original was well, more original (duh), hilarious and fresh. This one's a toned down version with the same structure... the same type of jokes, the same gal-gal talk, the same acting-against-the-bureau stunt, the same 'world peace' (in saccharine sweet tones) thing. even the snorts remain! aaaahhh! Plus, there aren't any cute guys inside, only an honest loser who blabbers and a donald-trump-like (almost there) boss who takes the credit for stuff he did not do.

******************************************************************

Dopey @ 2:43 PM | 0 comments

sabato, luglio 16, 2005

:: ENT clinic ::

the clinic assistant fusses around, repeatedly checking the number of each piece of equipment so that it would be 'just right for XYZ and Dr B of course.' she stocks up on the nescafé coffee powder, and locks up the rest in the overhead cupboard, 'all the fuss, have to lock up everything... don't lock up get into trouble. haizzz' she runs out of the clinic... and into the clinic and out again and in again... in a state of tethered nerves.

meanwhile, the medical student looks around curiously, inspects the special binoculars-like equipment used for inspecting the ears, 'no one else's clinic has something like this'. she notes the neatly arranged tongue depressors, thudicum speculums and mirrors... 'why's everything so perfect???' stumped, she looks around for an answer, finding none, she settles back into her comfy corner with the trusted corbridge. after 20 min of waiting for the doc, she gets a bit tired of corbridge and decides to take a closer look at the displays... and sees.... 'in appreciation of Dr B. from abc of Indonesia' and 'otolaryngo--- surgical instruction course'... and it dawns on her... 'AHHHHHH quick get out of the clinic if you want skin left on yr fats!!!'

ahh but it was too late... the eponymous Dr B. enters with a flourish and a 'welcome' before he whips open the file placed in front of him by tremulous hands... before the medical student could catch her breath, the questions came, like punches, hard and fast... very surgical in attitude. oooh.... her confidence crashed to sub zero as she struggles to drag out year 3 surgical information that had been filed into unknown depths to make way for new info... all the while thinking 'where are my synapses? where are my synapses?'

then came the thyroid nodule... 'ok, let's start examination' and Dr B. proceeds to sit down and left the way clear... it was obvious he wanted the student to do it. As she approaches with trepidation and feeling like her hands and feets were cotton balls, the patient looks at her with startlingly trusting eyes... 'oh god... i can't remember anything!' 'do not, DO NOT touch the patient!' she falters, looking at him with um.... questions in her eyes... and then she realises, oh, um... yah, prof rite, he wants a FULL examination, and proceeds to test the reflexes, pulse, for dysthyroid eye disease and so on.... after all that inspection, palpation, percussion and auscultation is over, she thought she was done... but... 'hey, we're in an ENT clinic, you haven't done the ENT examination yet?' patient looks at Dr. B and then at me... 'oh, i have to go back there to sit?' and looks at me with pity in her eyes... maybe her heart went out to me. sigh. the endless barrage of questions did not stop at physical examination, it went on to investigations and management...

ok ok she thought she was doing fine... he wasn't that mean afterall and she was learning... until...
'xyz, the referral form please...'
clinic assistant hands him the form.
'HAIZ. wrong form!'
clinic assistant grabs the form and hands him another one.
'NOT THIS! what's wrong with you? please LOOK at the form before you pass it to me?'
clinic assistant finally hands over the correct form. While Dr B. scribbles (ok, make that write, he writes rather legibly), the patient looks up at the medical student who had aptly and rapidly manoevuered herself out of firing range (ie. behind the Dr) and raises her eyebrows... the medical student offers a single eyebrow raise and a wry-i-think-i-like-to-suffer smile back. the patient nods empathetically... as she got up to leave, 'Next time please use your brain first ok...' 'yes, sorry sorry, dr' the harangued assistant replies. 'why are you so nervous today? don't be so nervous!' 'the XYZ... they're coming...'

'ROARRRRR WAT XYZ?!?! HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN WHY YOU ARE HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE?' his head swings in the direction of the medical student 'TO CARE FOR PATIENTS! PATIENTS COME FIRST! £#%^ THE XYZ' his head swivels between the scared assistant and the bewildered medical student. 'NEVER FORGET WHY YOU ARE HERE... PATIENTS COME FIRST!!!'

finally, at 1215... time to leave for tutorial... the medical student heaves a sigh of relief, but on retrospect, doesn't mind doing a clinic session with Dr B. again. maybe she felt the skinning was worth it cuz she learnt, or maybe she was (oh, still is) into masochism (without the sex part).

PS: does anyone know the word for a person who likes to inflict pain/suffering on himself? (without the sex part)

Dopey @ 8:36 PM | 0 comments

mercoledì, luglio 13, 2005

:: fun-quiz ::

Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. (no i do like to create conflict just for the fun of it once in a while...) Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you. (i'd like THIS to be true...)

The type of boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true. (hmmm doesn't sound like the typical Aquarian... in fact, the typical Aquarian is probably more in love with the ideals a person represents rather than the person himself. yes and i think i'm guilty of that... wahaha... it's going to be hard to find such a perfect man to love? ya?)

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person. (i think this should be correct)

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates. (still wait-ing...)

Your views on education:
You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job. (I don't like to study meh???)

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life. (true, i want job stability most of all)

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear. (yesh, very true)

Who is your true self:
You like privacy very much because you enjoy spending time with your own thoughts. You like to disappear when you cannot find solutions to your own problems, but you would feel better if you learned to share your thoughts with a person you trust. (hmm yeah, but it's not very easy to find someone i can totally trust... hmmm got a few though... yeah... it's impt to have someone you trust to talk with... and i don't mean a bf/gf, but just a bosom friend. helps a lot!)

Try me!

Dopey @ 8:49 PM | 0 comments

martedì, luglio 12, 2005

:: the lil' irritating things in life ::

A list of all those things that irritate us daily. They might seem trivial but when you put them all together, they'll probably cause a personality Type A person to get an AMI!

1. Kids (and adults) who rush to enter the lift as soon as the doors open, without letting the people within exit...
haven't these pple taken common sense 101? how to squeeze more people into a limited space that is already filled?

2. People who stand two-by-two and hog up the escalator (especially those in the mrt) such that others in a rush can't get past them. the worse are those who hog up the entire width of the fairly wide escalator with their enormous butt / shopping bags.

3. People who walk oh-so-slowly and just block up the entire passage way.

4. Salesgirls who keep hassling you to try this and that, take a look at this and that, despite the fact that you tell them you're fine looking around on your own OR when u tell them you're looking for a skirt and they pull out racks of sHirts for you.

5. People who thrust leaflets at you despite the fact that BOTH your arms are VERY visibly loaded with items. what do they want me to do? use my mouth to hold the flyer?

6. People who blast music into their ears (with headphones) in the library... so loudly that even you, sitting 3m away is able to tell what song is playing.

7. People who use the library reference section as a place for dating...

8. Filling up forms / admin matters just because the admin people are too free and want some papers to play with. (worse if you're asked to do something totally aimless and repetitive, cuz they lost yr info or sth)

9. Commuters who refuse to move towards the back of the bus, causing others to be unable to board the bus (and end up late for work).

10. Walking towards a pair of glass doors (meaning pple on both sides can see the opposite party), which swing both ways... but the idiotic AUNTIE on the other side waits for you to push the door open then before u can enter (after all you were the one who had to drag the heavy door open rite?) she makes for the same door... SO DUH and SOOO LAZY! got no hands to open yr own door? not like the door on the other side is jammed... and whoever reaches the door and pushes it first has the right of way wat. plus it's a push, not a pull... i could pull open the door for the other party opposite, but i couldn't possibly push it open and keep it open while the auntie walks through rite? no common sense!
anyway tt's what hap to me at the library. and since i did not have extendable hands like mr fantastic, i let go of the door (i think it hit common-sense challenged auntie's back) HA, she deserved it anyway.

11. A person rushing into your toilet cubicle after you'd opened the door... whoa, like some sex maniac or super high-tide person in the making. duh. how are you going to 'relief' yourself if the person who just used the cubicle can't even get out? DUH! (i'm beginning to agree with xx that perhaps, singaporeans are dumbbells... was the the word she used? or was it dumbasses... anyway both are nouns. will do)

12. something gross happened today... oh manz... someone actively -flirted- with me in the aim of making me leave my no. down so that he or his colleagues fr xxx insurance firm in singapore could probably hound me to get a savings policy. He was lucky I was in a rather good mood today or he'd have gotten flayed like that guy at orchard! yucks! wanna puke! no. 12 goes to ALL the surveyors upon the streets (who aim to get a contact no. from passer-bys). I've had enough of all this crap. There's surveyor fatigue too!

13. Those who are politically correct to the extent that they look and sound like robots. urgh. Would like to throttle them.

FINALLY... there's a simple solution to all this irritation.

Simply... think...
"Why get angry with the mistakes others make?"
"It's not worth it, is it?"

Dopey @ 8:01 PM | 0 comments

domenica, luglio 10, 2005

:: Just one more... indulge me ::



Global Personality Test Results
Stability (70%) high which suggests you are very relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic..
Orderliness (50%) medium which suggests you are moderately organized, hard working, and reliable while still remaining flexible, efficient, and fun.
Extraversion (53%) medium which suggests you average somewhere in between being assertive and social and being withdrawn and solitary.
Take Free Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com


trait snapshot:

rarely irritated, positive, tough, non phobic, fearless, likes the unknown, self reliant, high self control, confident, trusting, strong instincts, prudent, optimistic, willful, likes parties, prefers a specialized career, takes charge, altruistic, strong, high self concept, adventurous, practical, thoughtful
not very accurate actually...
i'm not 'rarely irritated', in fact it's rather easy to irritate me. (look out for the list of lil' irritating things in daily life). wilful? hehe... ok maybe my family will say that. likes parties? er... unless i host them. altruistic? ha no la... i'm very selfish one. :D and i'm not very thoughtful. keke... muz say sory here to all those pple i've offended by just shooting off anything i think of.

Dopey @ 10:19 PM | 0 comments

:: Locus of Control Test Results ::


Locus of Control Test Results
Internal Locus (61%) Individual believes that their life is defined more by their decisions and internal drive.
External Locus (39%) Individual believes that their life is defined more by genetics, environment, fate, or other external factors.
Take Free Locus of Control Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

In the 60s Psychologist Julian Rotter developed a theory called Locus of Control of Reinforcement. His theory centered around whether someone thinks their life is more influenced by external factors like fate, genetics, luck, environment (external locus of control) OR by internal factors like effort, tenacity, and free will (internal locus of control).
Your results suggest you tend to believe that internal factors like drive and free will define you more than external factors like genetics, fate, luck, and environment. Thus, you have an Internal Locus of Control

OH NOOOOOO!
i'm addicted! i can't seem to stop! manz... ARGH hypoC... thanks for the source of all these tests! lolz...

Dopey @ 2:57 PM | 0 comments

:: Career Inventory Test Results ::

This just goes to show how BORING i can be on a sunday...

Career Inventory Test Results
Extroversion
60%
Emotional Stability
80%
Orderliness
50%
Altruism
60%
Inquisitiveness
53%

You are an Inspirer, possible professions include - conference planner, speech pathologist, HR development trainer, ombudsman, clergy, journalist, newscaster, career counselor, housing director, character actor, marketing consultant, musician/composer, artist, information-graphics designer, human resource manager, merchandise planner, advertising account manager, dietitian/nutritionist, speech pathologist, massage therapist, editor/art director.

Dopey @ 2:40 PM | 0 comments

:: Intelligence Tests ::

ok, now i know i might get a barrage of comments by people saying i'm egoistical, self-satisfying and looking for self-praise by doing such tests. haha but heck la.

eg. you people always do this kind of tests because u need to see proof that you are clever and smart and all you are so ego.
me: wow, you are quite smart too, you are soooo right about me.
(heh heh... aka the xx technique)

Visual Pattern Fluid Intelligence Test Results
Your overall percentile is 93%.
Number Pattern Fluid Intelligence Test Results
Your overall percentile is 88%.
This was tough, my bro probably will score higher than me... he's much better spotting no. patterns. keke... headache liao. so tough!
Verbal Intelligence Test Results
Your overall percentile is 40%.
HAHA... so low! so paiseh... cannot let pple know i took E-lit. :/
Sir Francis Galton, the cousin of Charles Darwin, first popularized the notion of measurable intelligence in the late 1800s. Charles Spearman later discovered that all mental abilities tend to correlate together when statistically analyzed. He called this G. Modern researchers tend to agree that there are two kinds of intelligence, crystallized intelligence (learned knowledge) and fluid intelligence (abstract processing ability). Most non-verbal intelligence tests measure the latter. Some research suggests that fluid intelligence may correlate best to G.

Dopey @ 1:43 PM | 0 comments

:: What kind of leader are you? ::



What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com


this is sad, :(
lolz i got gandhi initially, but that was dreadfully wrong... so i redid the test 2 more times and both times i got saddam... EEEEEEEEEKS!

Dopey @ 1:24 PM | 0 comments

:: "oops" Freudian-slip ::


Freudian Inventory Results
Oral (53%) you appear to have a good balance of independence and interdependence knowing when to accept help and when to do things on your own.
Anal (53%) you appear to have a good balance of self control and spontaneity, order and chaos, variety and selectivity.
Phallic (43%) you appear to have a good balance of sexual awareness and sexual composure.
Latency (53%) you appear to have a good balance of abstract knowledge seeking and practicality, dealing with real world responsibilities while still cultivating your abstract and creative faculties and interests.
Genital (60%) you appear to be somewhere between a progressive/openminded and regressive/closeminded outlook on life.
Take Free Freudian Inventory Test
personality tests by similarminds.com
oooh looks well-balanced... i used to be a bit too 'anal' (guys, stop yr sniggering!!!)
i do know some guys are too 'orally' fixated. quite irritating...

Dopey @ 1:07 PM | 0 comments

:: The Big Five Test ::
The Big Five is the most proven personality test in the academic research community presently. It is composed of 5 factors - open-mindedness, conscientiousness, agreeableness, emotional stability, and extroversion (the factor names vary a little among authors).

Advanced Big 45 Personality Test Results
Gregariousness38%
Sociability54%
Assertiveness74%
Poise62%
Leadership62%
Provocativeness54%
Self-Disclosure62%
Talkativeness50%
Group Attachment50%
Extroversion56%
Understanding70%
Warmth70%
Morality70%
Pleasantness58%
Empathy70%
Cooperation58%
Sympathy70%
Tenderness54%
Nurturance54%
Accommodation63%
Conscientiousness70%
Efficiency74%
Dutifulness70%
Purposefulness74%
Organization78%
Cautiousness42%
Rationality74%
Perfectionism70%
Planning62%
Orderliness68%
Stability58%
Happiness66%
Calmness46%
Moderation54%
Toughness70%
Impulse Control46%
Imperturbability70%
Cool-headedness46%
Tranquility50%
Emotional Stability56%
Intellect66%
Ingenuity70%
Reflection78%
Competence74%
Quickness78%
Introspection66%
Creativity70%
Imagination66%
Depth78%
Openmindedness71%
Take Free Advanced Big 45 Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com
omg i score so high on those in red!
seems like i have developed a bit more 'heart' aka emotion since J2 when i took a similar test... hmmm still rem sneaking a look at the psychologist's file wahaha... don't think the surveillance cam caught me . :D

Dopey @ 12:17 PM | 0 comments

mercoledì, luglio 06, 2005

:: more updates ::

hahaha... first time in my life i have a guy kneeling on one knee in front of me manz... sooooo romantic ;) like prince charming.... kekeke... shucks, just lack the ring... and it was such a memorable moment that wenky's camera was missed...

Dopey @ 11:06 PM | 0 comments

martedì, luglio 05, 2005

:: ophthalmic updates ::

1. i DO NOT have esotropia/convergent squint... but i do have eXophoria... as for the convergent squint-look i have at times... sigh. dr G says 'it's just the way you look'...

SIIIIGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH

2. my pupil's perfectly alright... my optic disc CAN be seen even if it's undilated. nothing to do with DM k...

3. i do look like i'm from china? *heavens* NOOOOOOO
lecture with the-one-who-loves-neuro-ophthalmology was eh... ODD.

here are some choice excerpts:
"what is charity? what is the compassion that we talk of? what is the seamless machine???"
answer: north of the river south of the lake, the whole world is full of gold.

anywayz, he kept asking me 'ni ming bai mah?' pengz...

on the bright side, if i do look like i'm from china, i hope i have their complexion. kekeke... better than looking like a mandarin teacher... toot toot one. :P HAHAHAHAH....

4. my new hobby: squint at kids to see if they have strabismus. hehehe...
new clinic past time: stick out tongue and make funny monster faces at kids while standing in the neighbouring cubicle (with it's transparent dividers), out of sight of the doc, while he's doing the cover test/pupillary reflex is being tested. kekeke...

5. i am still a bit blur regarding my case study. i'm too lazy to do it! how...

6. my vision prob deteriorated from a 6/8-> 6/18 during ophthalmo?!?!?

7. ophthalmo.... zui4 gao1 jing4 jie4
Doc: hello, can u see this patient? he has got a fourth nerve palsy...
Orthoptist: sure...
20 min later...
Orthoptist: Hi Dr, this patient has a sixth nerve palsy...
Doc: so now, we know...
Orthoptist: yes, of course...

how cool is that.... hehehe.... u pple who haven't done ophthalmology won't know what i'm talking about hahaha! :D

coming up... review of CDs...

Dopey @ 7:31 PM | 0 comments

:: Film Review - 'War of the Worlds' ::

It was a hazardous night out... first there was poor yx with her injured knee... and then -ALL- of us had to take the later show with seats that suxed BIG time... first row ok... i think GV's trying to earn more money by just cramming as many ppl into the cinema as possible with the result tt 5 of us were craning out necks at the screen that simply -TOWERED- over us... seats unfortunately, could not be tilted backwards. :(

on to the film!

it had a so-so beginning, not very original, kind of reminded me of one of the james bond's movies beginning... the one with oozy amoeba like creatures... funnily, in the middle of tt beginning, i had a flash of wy and her purple amoeba???

tom cruise... oh manz he's either covered with grim or sweat or shaggy fringe. so urky.

the gal with the huge huge eyes... grey irises? cool... but a hypochondriac just like K. haha... a bit withdrawn, i suddenly though tt perhaps this might be ew's future kid... hmmmm... ya maybe ew should watch this film first to decide whether she wants to start a family in the future. :P

and i would love to SMACK roby's face. that's what ray (cruise) ought to have done, punched that whiny face with his infantile mind, though he looks like he's older than wenky already...

those machines were cool, i got to get one of those lasers they use! wow! kills without blood ya know, pple just go poof into dust. reminds me of 'buffy the vampire slayer' haha...

the ending was CRAP. all those invaders just DIED cuz they didn't have immune systems to take care of the bacteria in their food ie. us??? soooooo anti-climax.

my preferred ending:
Roby DIES a TRAGIC death, Ray sees him being engulfed in flames in the explosion.
Boston gets razed to the ground though Ray's wife, her current husband and her parents survive...
the scene closing with all those machines continuing their annihilation while some kind of sad, white words scroll down the screen...

either that, or the movie gets extended by at least an hour to wrap up the death of those machines due to the tiny bacteria more believable...

Dopey @ 5:53 PM | 0 comments

domenica, luglio 03, 2005

:: Book Review - 'We The Living' by Ayn Rand ::

my last bk review for the hols... kinda was too take up with optic discs to blog about it...

'We The Living' was one of the first books written by Ayn Rand (upon her arrival in 'the land of the free') and it is the closest to an autobiography. Not one of her life but of her beliefs and vision for the future. Cool isn't it?

To put it simply, it's about the story of a bourgeoise Kira (what a pretty name!) Argounova in the few years right after the success of the October Revolution. It talks of the turbulent times and the uncertainty that abound every single person in the 'liberalised' city of Petrograd. The language is so real it proves that we do not need 'a picture to tell a thousand words'! Take for example, the opening paragraph:

Petrograd smelt of carbolic acid. A pinkish-gray banner that had been red, hung in the webbing of steel beams. Tall girders rose to a roof of glass panes gray as the stell with the dust and wind of many years; some of the panes were broken, pierced by forgotten shots, sharp edges gaping upon a sky gray as the glass. Under the banner hung a fringe of cobwebs; under the cobwebs - a huge railway clock with black figures on a yellow face and no hands. Under the clock, a crowd of pale faces and greasy overcoats waited for the train.

But what i admire most about the writing style is her uncanny to be able to portray a person's character simply by choosing apt words to describe the persons' physical appearance:

"Kira Argounova entered Petrograd on the threshold of a box car. She stood straight, motionless, with the graceful indifference of a traveler on a luxurious ocean liner, with an old blue suit of faded cloth, with slender, sunburned legs and no stockings. She had an old piece of plaid silk around hre neck, and short tousled hair, and a stockingcap with a bright yellow tassel. She had a calm mouth and slightly widened eyes with the defiant, enraptured, solemnly and fearfully expectant look of a warrior who is entering a strange city and is not quite sure whether he is entering it as a conqueror or a captive."

Hmmm I must attempt to learn from this. In one of my blogs to follow, I shall attempt to describe various ppl I know and perhaps u guys could guess who I'm referring to?

The other two main characters in the novel are Lev Kovalensky and Andrei Taganov. The former a bourgeoise and the latter, a communist revolutionary. Both are in love with Kira. Through the mesh of entangled relations and emotions, we're able to get a rare but realistic glimpse into life in the Soviet Union (who better to tell us but Rand, who suffered at its hands?) Apart from that, we learn how flawed the theory of communism is and how it destroys the lives and willpower to live of the people it promised to liberate from oppression and poverty.

Yet, this novel does not merely condone communist policies and thoughts, it censures those who adopt a communistic/self-sacrificing attitude towards their own life. Even in a democratic nation, you'd be surprised at how many are behaving 'like communist's in the way they live their lives...

It's hard for me to explain just what I mean...

Read this:

No one can tell men what they must live for. No one can take that right - because there are things in men, in the best of us, which are above all states, above all collectives! ... Every honest man lives for himself. Every man worth calling a man lives for himself. The one who doesn't - doesn't live at all. You canot change it. You cannot change it because that's the way man is born, alone, complete, an end in himself. No laws, no Party, no G.P.U. will ever kill that thing in man which knows how to say 'I'. You canot enslave man's mind, you can only destroy it. ... Look at those whom you allow to triumph. Deny the best in men - and see what will survive. Do we want the crippled, creeping, crawling, broken monstrosities that we're producing? Are we not castrating life in order to perpetuate it? ... What is our goal, comrades? What are we doing? Do we want to feed a starved humanity in order to let it live? Do we want to strangle its life in order to feed it?

Well, what this novel brought out in me was a strong desire to live life meaningfully and to the max. I loathe the people who do not know how to live. Those who immerse themselves in 'fun' activities such as clubbing, boozing, gambling, sleeping around, and all the other meaningless, time-wasting 'hobbies'. Do not be mistaken, I'm not saying that all men must work to their death, and spend all their free time working more... what I am exhorting all to do is to make the fullest use of their life to achieve what their potential will allow them to, to improve, to grow and to embrace life.

Sigh, it's probably the Aquarian in me... I set such high standards for myself and all around me. I'll probably be doomed to spend my life alone... Or as they said, lock myself up in an ivory tower in contemplation of such intangible values that I end up like some kind of Rapunzel.

Dopey @ 7:03 PM | 0 comments

venerdì, luglio 01, 2005

Traditional Aquarian Traits

Friendly and humanitarian
Honest and loyal
Original and inventive
Independent and intellectual

On the dark side....
Intractable and contrary
Perverse and unpredictable
Unemotional and detached

Aquarius About Your Sign...
Aquarians basically possess strong and attractive personalities. They fall into two principle types: one shy, sensitive, gentle and patient; the other exuberant, lively and exhibitionist, sometimes hiding the considerable depths of their character under a cloak of frivolity. Both types are strong willed and forceful in their different ways and have strong convictions, though as they seek truth above all things, they are usually honest enough to change their opinions, however firmly held, if evidence comes to light which persuades them that they have been mistaken. They have a breadth of vision that brings diverse factors into a whole, and can see both sides of an argument without shilly-shallying as to which side to take. Consequently they are unprejudiced and tolerant of other points of view. This is because they can see the validity of the argument, even if they do not accept it themselves. They obey the Quaker exhortation to "Be open to truth, from whatever source it comes," and are prepared to learn from everyone.
Both types are humane, frank, serious minded, genial, refined, sometimes ethereal, and idealistic, though this last quality is tempered with a sensible practicality. They are quick, active and persevering without being self-assertive, and express themselves with reason, moderation and sometimes, a dry humor.

They are nearly always intelligent, concise, clear and logical. Many are strongly imaginative and psychically intuitive, so that the Age of Aquarius, which is about to begin, is much anticipated by psychic circles as an age in which mankind will experience a great spiritual awakening. The Aquarian philosophical and spiritual bent may be dangerous in that it can drive the subjects into an ivory-tower existence where they meditate on abstractions that bear little relevance to life. On the other hand it can help the many who have scientific leanings to combine these with the Aquarian yearning for the universal recognition of the brotherhood of man, and to embark on scientific research to fulfill their philanthropic ideals of benefiting mankind. When some cause or work of this nature inspires them, they are capable of such devotion to it that they may drive themselves to the point of exhaustion and even risk injuring their health.

Both types need to retire from the world at times and to become temporary loners. They appreciate opportunities for meditation or, if they are religious, of retreats. Even in company they are fiercely independent, refusing to follow the crowd. They dislike interference by others, however helpfully intended, and will accept it only on their own terms. Normally they have good taste in drama, music and art, and are also gifted in the arts, especially drama.

In spite of the often intensely magnetic, forthcoming and open personality of the more extrovert kind of Aquarian, and of their desire to help humanity, neither type makes friends easily. They sometimes appear to condescend to others and take too little trouble to cultivate the acquaintance of people who do not particularly appeal to them. They do not give themselves easily - perhaps their judgment of human nature is too good for that - and are sometimes accounted cold. But once they decide that someone is worthy of their friendship or love, they can exert an almost hypnotic and irresistible mental attraction on them and will themselves become tenacious friends or lovers, ready to sacrifice everything for their partners and be faithful to them for life. However, they are sometimes disappointed emotionally because their own high personal ideals cause them to demand more of others than is reasonable. And if they are deceived their anger is terrible. If disillusioned, they do not forgive.

Aquarians work best in group projects, provided that they are recognized as having a leading part in them. They have a feeling of unity with nature and a desire for knowledge and truth that makes them admirable scientists, especially astronomers and natural historians. They may excel in photography, radiography, electronics - anything connected with the electrical and radio industries - aviation and everything technical. On the arts and humanities side their progressive tendencies can be expressed in writing, especially poetry, and broadcasting, or as welfare workers and teachers. Some have gifts as entertainers and make good character actors (having an ability to mimic) and musicians. The more psychic among them possess healing gifts, especially in curing the mentally sick.

Among the faults to which they are liable are fanatical eccentricity, wayward egotism, excessive detachment and an inclination to retreat from life and society, and a tendency to be extremely dogmatic in their opinions. Aquarians can be a threat to all they survey or a great boon for humanity in general. Circumstances - for example, continuous opposition to a cause they hold dear - may cause the atrophy of the openness of mind that is one of the Aquarian's most attractive traits. They may express a lack of integrity in broken promises, secretiveness or cunning. Simmering anger and resentment, rudeness or, worse, a tense, threatening silence which may suddenly burst out in eruptions of extreme temper, these are all part of the negative side of the Aquarian. This can also reveal itself in a sustained hatred for enemies that is capable of enlarging itself into a misanthropy toward the whole of mankind.

Possible Health Concerns...
As Aquarius is said to govern the legs from knees to ankles and the circulation of blood, its natives are susceptible to ailments particularly in the legs and ankles, such as cramps, and are also liable to spasmodic and nervous complaints, as well as wind, catarrh, diarrhea, dropsy, goiter and delirium tremens - so that the avoidance of alcohol is important for those Aquarians who have a taste for it.

LIKES
Fighting for Causes
Dreaming and Planning for the Future
Thinking of the Past
Good Companions
Having Fun


DISLIKES
Full of Air Promises
Excessive Loneliness
The Ordinary
Imitations
Idealistic


PROBLEMS THAT MAY ARISE FOR YOU, AND THEIR SOLUTIONS
As with all sun signs, we all have unique traits to our personalities. When these traits are suppressed, or unrealized, problems will arise. However, with astrology we can examine the problem and assess the proper solution based on the sun sign characteristics. As an Aquarius you may see things below that really strike home. Try the solution, you most likely will be amazed at the results. If you find yourself on the receiving end of the negatives below, it is because you are failing to express the positive.

Problem: Being left all alone while others enjoy the companionship you long for.

Solution: You should practice expressing your humanity by accepting people the way they are and not find too much fault in them.

Problem: You always seem to miss the boat when it comes to love.

Solution: Try letting down the mental guard that you keep on your emotions that stops you from being the self you long to be.

Problem: You always seem to miss out on the better jobs or big promotions at work.S

olution: Learn to use your positive side in teamwork and group effort, the lone wolf approach will get you nowhere.

Problem: You seem to become physically ill more than you should.

Solution: By repressing your emotions you drive the unrest deep inside where it can cost you in terms of health. Express your feelings but do it with tact.

Source: http://www.astrology-online.com/site_map.htm

Dopey @ 8:17 PM | 0 comments

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