venerdì, ottobre 01, 2004
:: pissed ::i am so DAMN PISSED OFF! with this person with the nick 'sauvignon blanc' on my icq. this person simply PERSISTS on talking about his God in EVERY SINGLE sentence. i can't stand it. he insists that he's not forcing his religion on me, yeah rite... come on... i simply can't stand it. i know many of you reading this blog might be a devout Christian, and maybe you won't like what i say here... so well, dun read it. to the others, this is a blog full of 'angst' maybe a lot like xiaxue's but with lesser sense in it. i highly advise you not to read it. and i highly advise all not to post any comments on my taggie. i'm still trying to cool down.
i cannot stand people who insert, it's all thanks to God that..., if it wasn't for God..., i thank God for all that i have... please... i know He's an important influence in your life. but do you realise that by saying that, you are simply implying (at least to me) that you are just a puppet? a means through which GOD exerts influence in this world? i dunno, heck maybe this is even true... (maybe it's what the bible says) but then, i beg to differ. mainly because i have a different religion. one that teaches us just to do good without expecting rewards, to live life according to the right principles. It doesn't mention our god acting through us, but to me, he's more like a pillar where i can place my faith with. i feel that Buddha is less vindictive (heck i mean, all gods shldn't be, but comparatively, yea i think so), more peaceful, and well... i dun hear him saying that we shall not worship other gods... u know, Buddhism gives me a feeling of freedom in my beliefs, and doing good just because it's good to do so... not like affiliated to my religion, or doing it for someone... also, Do you hear pple saying it's all thanks to Buddha that i... it's all the work of Buddha? well, NO! i'm sorry to say, but pple who KEEP saying their thanks to God simply sound like a simpering idiot to me. i'm sorry, i'll probably be sent to Hell anyway. evil as i am... really, i think action speaks louder than words, and if those pple could save their breath from their continuous praise of their Lord (especially in front of pple like me who are not very religious and also not even of their faith), you could spend that time doing more constructive things...
i especially hate it whe this 'sauvignon blanc' says something like this: God works his wonders through the doctors and through medical science... he makes it sound as if, when i'm a doctor, or when i'm doing whatever i'm doing in my life now, it's as if i'm just nothing. God is working through me. i hate feeling like a puppet, lemme tell you. i believe in myself, in what i do. if God's going to work his miracles, then he doesn't need to choose doctors, he doesn't need to choose anyone. heck i mean, you don't even end up with cancer, cuz God is working his miracle through you. ok... fine... i admit it, i'm uptight and i'm narrow-minded. but that's the way i am. i don't agree with this theory. and i tell him that. and he's like... well you need to know this, everyone has the right to voice their beliefs where ever and whenever they wish to. yah of cuz... and i'm voicing mine as well. so stop putting me down! i am simply not interested in discussing religion with others. maybe i'm not even a buddhist, maybe i'm an atheist... oh u can start to pity me now... yeah, this FOOL who doesn't have a RELIGION, no FAITH, so SKEPTICAL... ooh yeah... go on... i'm loving it better every single moment. at least better than when u rave about God. STOP ENFORCING YOUR RELIGION ON ME!
when i'm not interested, i'm not interested. i don't go back on my words... i'd rather eat my tendon tapper. (sorry i dun wear a cap). i'm so glad that this 'sauvignon blanc' is on my ignore list. it's like a breeze just went through my room. and i'm only grateful to him for one thing... jolting me into a state of alertness and energy so that i can work further on my writeup.
i just got to let this all out.
to all my friends who are Christians/Catholics, i dun mean anything personal to u guys. u guys are normal... and i admire your quiet faith in yr religion, instead of proclaiming it in every sentence.
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francesca chiu
2 eyebags & 5 wrinkles
on long-term dormicum drip
KIV IMH
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