domenica, marzo 13, 2005
:: insomnia! ::in the wee hours of 4am, i was tossing and turning in my bed, okay that sounded vaguely elegant, i was getting tangled up with the sheets and just couldn't fall asleep. (NB. why is it 'fall' asleep? and not 'lie' asleep or something else?) there was just this feeling that something i had done wasn't right. so i was thinking.... did i switch off the lights? check. switch off the modem? check. brush my teeth? (just kidding) and then i realised...
shing.
no i wasn't thinking about shing... (what would i be if i were thinking of her at 4am?!?!) i thought of something she said to me a couple of weeks ago...
i think i had a special connection with a friend... we'd known each other for almost 3.5 years now and for the first two years at least, there was a special friendship between us? i think. or rather the friendship was a special one; it was very formative. kind of opened my eyes to the world out there and taught me to set my sights 'far and wide' and just don't be limited geographically. we got along rather famously... i define 'rather famously' as anyone who can b*tch along the same lines of thought as myself. we hung out quite a lot...
fast forward to present... i decided to try to recall every single scrap of fact about this friend and our friendship, and i realised, i could probably name more stuff about it as compared to other people who've had a 3.5-year friendship with me. implication? it was either special or i had a crush...
anyway, things went a bit wonky once i started to 'go steady' with nico... and that friend kind of kept away... ok... it was me. i think i kind of kept away fr that friend, and attempted to make things more um... platonic? ok... i neglected my friend!!! i'm so sorry about that!
before i fell asleep, this kind of came into my head...
empezamos como almas gemelas, un cristal perfecto. pero no abracé lo que teníamos en mi pecho y ahora, se me queda nada sólo los pedazos de un corazón descuidado. y no hay nada que pueda arreglarlo...
and in the words of one of my favourite songs...
Ay si regresarás a mi, encendería el sol mil primarveras. Si regresarás por mi sería un milagro cada beso que me dieras, pero hoy te vas y no hay vuelta atrás...
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francesca chiu
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